(中英双语)中国女性与多元化高端访谈记录(2)
A dialogue between Christine Liu, Founder of sHero, and Xiangwei Gong, President, DSM Hydrocolloids
【(中英双语)中国女性与多元化高端访谈记录(2)】女性领导力组织sHero创始人刘慧和帝斯曼亲水胶体总裁龚湘伟的一场对话
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Part 2
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C: Was there a difficult moment, you know, you had to make a critical decision or tough decision?
C: 那有没有一个非常艰难的时刻,你必须要做出一个重要的决定,或艰难的决定?
12.18.2017, at DSM Shanghai Campus 2017.12.18. 帝斯曼上海园区 XW: From time to time you get those moments, it’s like, oh, why am I doing this? Like for example when I moved to the US, and I had a very good opportunity, an exciting career opportunity, but I was freshly divorced. And I was a single mother and had my daughter with me. And I remembered the first day when I dropped her off at the daycare. She didn’t speak any English. And I was on my way driving to work... I dropped her off at the daycare center. She pressed her hands and face on the window, and full of tears. And I was driving to work, full of tears. And I thought to myself, oh God, what am I doing here? But you know, eventually, I am glad that I didn’t quit, because as I told you, she looks up to me. So it is not the time that you spent counts, it is really also the heart, the love, the effort. And she realizes that. She realizes that, even if I am not always with her, she knows how much I love her, how much she means to me. The same with my son actually.
XW: 不时的会有这样的时刻,你会自问,噢,我为什么在做这些呀?例如我刚搬到美国去的时候。我有一个很好的、很令我兴奋的职业机会。但是我当时刚刚离婚。我当时是个带着女儿的单身妈妈。我记得我第一次把她带到托儿所的那天。她当时不会说英语。我当时在开车去工作的路上。我把她放在托儿中心,她把脸和手都紧紧地压在窗玻璃上,满脸泪水;我在开车去工作的路上,也满脸泪水。我当时自己想,我的天啊,我到底在做什么?但是你知道,...... 我庆幸自己没有放弃。因为就像我刚刚告诉你的,她是仰视看我的。所以,发挥关键作用的其实不是你花的时间,而真的更是你的心、你的爱、你所付出的努力。尽管我不是时时刻刻和她在一起,但是她知道。她知道我有多么爱她,她对我意味着什么。对我儿子实际上也是一样的。
C: So, it’s kind of your pride, right, to be the mother of two children?
C: 所以,你为成为两个孩子的母亲而感到骄傲,对么?
XW: Yes, that’s my biggest achievement.
XW: 是的,那是我最大的成就。
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NJ 2001 Anna’s first Halloween in America 2001秋,安娜在美国的第一个万圣节 C: You know, Xiang Wei, so we…you know sometimes we struggle with time. We only have twenty-four hours. We have two jobs (one at work, on at home), as we said. At the same time, I also realize that we spend time supporting other women and young professionals. What motivates you to do that?
C: 你知道的,湘伟,我们...... 你知道,有时候我们在时间上很挣扎。我们每个人只有二十四小时,正如我们说的,我们都有两份的工作要做(一份在公司,一份在家里)。同时,我也意识到我们会花费时间去支持其它的女性和年轻的职场人士,是什么促使你做这些的呢?
XW: What motivates me? It’s the drive of life. It’s living. I don’t think we have a choice. I think we are born, we are here. And as long as we are here, let’s do something. So when we were kids ourselves, and also on the way growing up, we wanted to basically survive. We need to study, find a job, make a living. Then, we think about the continuation of our life and that is very often via having children, publishing a book, whatever it is. It’s all part of … part of you, the continuation of you, your legacy. So I have done that, my children are also growing up. And I still…I still have a lot of energy. I still actually have a lot of…how should I say… mental energy and physical energy. And…and It’s good for me to do something, to do something useful. So I’m not even thinking about, you know...in a way, not thinking about giving back. It’s really not. It’s really just about being…feeling alive, feeling good about myself. And at this stage of my life, part of that is really just being with people, contributing the way I can, as much as I can. And in that way, I also receive, I get a lot of energy back actually. It’s just really feeling great.
XW: 是什么给我动力?是生命本身的驱使吧。是活着(的一部分)。我认为我们没有选择。我觉得我们来到了这个世界,我们活着,只要我们活着,就做点什么呗。当我们自己还是孩子的时候,还有我们一路成长的时候,我们基本就是为了生存而活。我们需要学习,找工作,谋生。然后,我们考虑生命的延续,生命的延续一般都通过生孩子,或者出本书, 或者其它任何方式。无论是什么,这都是你人生中的一部分,你的延续,你的传承。我已经做了一些,我的孩子也长大了。但是我现在依然有很多的能量,怎么说呢,其实我真还有很大的,包括内心的能量和身体的能量。这些能量在赋予我做些事情,一些有用的事情,这本身对我自己是有帮助的。所以我甚至没有想过,你知道的,没有想过我去帮别人是在回报社会,其实真不是什么回报社会。这其实是一种活着的感觉,我喜欢有这种感觉的自己。在我生命的这个阶段,其中一部分我能做的就是和人相处,用我自己的方式尽力去做点什么,尽力而为。通过这种方法,我得到了收获,我也得到了很多能量的回馈,这真的让我感觉很好。
C: Yeah, that’s wonderful, when we talk about the young people generation, especially in China we talk about the changing workforce and changing workplace, and then when you support young women and also the young professionals, so from your personal and professional life experiences, what kind of advice if you have a chance and you can give to them?
C: 是,那真的很棒!当我们谈到年轻的一代的时候,尤其是在中国我们会谈到不断变化的劳动市场和不断变化的工作环境。当你支持与鼓励年轻女性和年轻职场人士,从你的个人生活和专业经历角度,如果你有这个机会的话,你可以给他们一些什么样的建议?
XW: You see if we are lucky, or you are lucky, you are watching us talking (or reading this), and you may get a moment of inspiration. It is like, Oh! Wow! Yeah! I hope that happens from time to time. But what will really make a difference is how you look to yourself, what you do with what you heard, because there is a lot of information out there, a lot of real role models up there, but really it comes down to you. Only you yourself know what you want, this is now what I refer to as roots, you need to look into yourself what you really want. We all have a dream, I am sure when we were children we all had all kinds of fantasies and in all kinds of ways, imagined how we would be, where we would be and what life would be like. And then of course, there are disappointments in life, and how you deal with those disappointments? It’s all up to you. From time to time, I think you need go back to where you came from. There, there is a fountain. It’s a deep well. It is a fountain of inspiration that you can draw from. So you maybe, you get triggers, like a conversation like that, may trigger you to go back to childhood. ... And like for me, for example, I always imagined to be a mother, ... I always imagined that I could do whatever I wanted to do, and that’s a major empowerment from me, inside of me. And you have that source of power, but only you know it.
XW: 你看,如果我们很幸运,或者你们很幸运正在看我们的这个访谈节目(读这篇笔录),你可能会得到某些瞬间的激励,你会哦,哇,耶,那样地觉得很受鼓舞,我希望这样的事情能都一直发生。但是真正起作用的,是你怎样看待你自己,是你听过了之后会怎么做。因为生活中会有很多这样的信息,前面有很多真实的榜样,但是真正的东西却取决于你自己。只有你自己知道你真正想要的是什么,这就是我之前提到的根。你必须要一直看到你的内心深处,挖掘出你真正想要的是什么。我们都会有梦想,我相信在我们的孩童时代我们都会有各种奇特的梦想,梦想会长不同的样子,我们想象我们会成为什么样子,我们会在哪里,生活会是什么样子。然后,当然,生活中有失望,你会怎样对待失望呢?这是完全取决于你自己的。 我觉得你应该时不时地回归本心,那里有泉水,一口深井。这是你可以汲取灵感的源泉。你可能会有一个触发点,例如刚刚的谈话可能会触发你回想童年。例如就我来说,我(孩提时)一直就想象着(将来要)成为一个妈妈,...... 我经常会想象我可以做任何我想做的事情。这些想象是我一个主要的能量来源,来自于我的内心。你也有这种能量的源泉,但是只有你自己知道它。
C:Is that ok to give an example? You know you realize, yes, what you say, what you do, really make an impact on her life or his life, when you do this supporting work.
C: 你可以给我们举一个例子吗?你知道的,当你在做类似帮助他人的行动时,你所说的、所做的,真的对他/她的生活产生了重要的影响?
XW: People say that to me, a lot. I don’t know, I hope so, I hope so I believe so. I think everyday we make an impact. I believe there is impact. But probably it is hard for me to know. But it doesn’t matter. Because it is all accumulative.
XW: 人们都对我这样说,很多情况下。我不知道。我希望如此。我希望如此, 我相信是这样的,我认为我们每天都会产生影响的。我相信(我们做的事情)都是有影响的。但是很可能我很难知道(结果)。但那不重要。因为这都是日积月累的。
XW: This is all about our human life. So, along my journey, there are many many situations where I just learned some things, from one word, from one line, one trigger. Like this (referring to this very dialogue with Christine), I am sure I am learning something. But is that impact known to me now? Maybe not. So we have heard Steve Jobs say “connecting dots.” You can only connect thoughts backward. And I really believe that. But in order to connect dots backward, you often must have that presence in mind. You cannot ignore yourself, you can’t ignore the little voices. Every little thing matters. It depends how you connect these dots... I am sure I have been able to provide the little dots on people.
XW: My team have told me for example, that when I come to work with a smile, they feel that this day is great, is going to be great. (C: You make the day) I make the day and give them encouragement. They feel happier and they have more energy. They have more optimism about their future, about our business. So that is just one little example.
XW: 这都是关于我们人的一生。在我的人生旅途中,从很多的点点滴滴以及一些契机中学到了很多,可能是一个词,一句话,或是一个触发点。就像现在(我们这场对话),我确信我正在学到一些东西,但是它的影响我现在就能知道吗?可能不会。正如史蒂夫.乔布斯所讲的-连接生活中的点。你只能从后往前去把一些想法联系起来。我真的相信这一点。但是为了能够把现在(未来)与过去连接起来,你的大脑必须非常留意当下。你不能忽视你自己,不能忽视那些(内心的)小声音。每一件小事都会有作用,就取决于你如何连接这些生活中的点。我确信我应该给过别人一些小小的连线的点。
例如我的团队成员们经常跟我讲,每当我带着微笑来工作时,他们就觉得这一天会是很棒的一天。(C:你成就了他们的一天)我成就他们的一天,也鼓舞他们,让他们觉得更开心,更有能量。他们对未来、对我们的业务也更乐观。这就是一个小例子。
IPWS’ White Party fundraising for WAFW Jun 09.2018,18年6月9日,IPWS 为世界女性未来发展学院组织的募捐活动 (To be continued)
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